Rob Rattenbury has dabbled in many sports over the years. Photo / NZME
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I have played many sports in my life with varying degrees of success and have enjoyed all but one.
Most codes for football, cricket, softball, athletics, cycling, swimming, triathlon, martial arts, boxing, darts, billiards, tiddlywinks, you name it
it, I probably had a tear in it.
The old story. If buddies were there, I’d end up there too.
Overall, I probably struggled to be average in some sports, but was an avid amateur in others.
For me, sport isn’t just about winning. It’s about friendship, skills, timing, focus, social fun, health and just having a good time. I’ve had my moments, wins, placements, trophies, good times, but never good enough to surpass myself.
However, I have to admit that I am mentally unsuitable for playing golf.
I played lawn bowls for about 20 years. A simple game in theory. Get the big black ball closest to the small white one. In practice, this is anything but easy. I call it character building. It’s a great game and great culture to be a part of. Good people play boules and it’s very strong in Whanganui.
The two basic principles of turf bowls are weight and green. That’s all you have to think about most of the time. But then there is the condition of the rink, the wind, the weather. These are all factors that can have a huge impact on the outcome. The player or team that masters each of these factors in a game the fastest has a good chance of winning.
It’s a relaxing atmosphere on a nice day at a bowling club. There is morning tea, lunch and afternoon tea. A bar for the evening and a raffle or two to liven up the day. It’s usually a quiet game that requires skill, concentration, and focus.
There is of course the serious side. Representative teams, national teams, international selection for Commonwealth Games teams.
But club days are the be-all and end-all of sport. Days where everyone, from beginners to masters, can play in tournaments or just a roll-up at their level on the same team. Some players are very competitive; others just drive by quietly. It’s a sport for everyone.
I’ve never been interested in golf: as the saying goes, it’s just a way of ruining a good walk. However, I found myself part of a group of four to eight people who loved trout fishing, owned boats and competed in the Kinloch trout fishing competition for many years.
The others were all very good golfers so I got sucked into Ambrose style games, nine holes on Kinloch or Wairakei courses.
At first I thought I would just drive through. Stick and ball, don’t worry how hard can it be? My buddies hit the ball miles from the tee. knock me out No coaching from my buddies, focus and effort from me worked. When I first started, it was usually a good day to get past the ladies’ tee.
Funnily enough, putting was easy once I finally found my way to the green after zigzagging up the fairway, exploring the long grass and trees along the side, and occasionally losing my ball. Presumably the years of lawn bowls helped – weight and focus.
The angrier I got, the worse it got. Getting loads from my buddies didn’t help. Mind you, I can dish out a lot, so I just took it by the chin.
Over the years the four of us would also play at Tawhero or Castlecliff on some Friday afternoons or Saturday mornings. I never had rackets; Being a tax-savvy person with no real interest in the game, I just borrowed my buddies’ ones.
Golf never grabbed me. When a sport grabs me, I really get into it, all the gear and clothing. I join the club, serve on the committees, fundraise, sell raffles, work the bar, organize trips to other clubs, all those good things that thousands of athletes around the country love to do.
My buddies kept mentioning a slow improvement and implied it was time I got my own racquets and stop hitting theirs. I laughed, of course, as I grabbed my partner’s enormously expensive driver.
But over a period of a few weeks, I began to think that maybe I should get some bats. I was only slightly hopeless at the game now, didn’t enjoy it, only did it to even the numbers and because my buddies were really good guys that I enjoyed being with.
I decided that apart from friendship, golf wasn’t really for me. I always have trouble understanding why people like it so much. Also, it’s probably the only physical activity that’s far beyond my competence and ability.
We don’t do taupō anymore, so I don’t have to suffer through nine holes of self-inflicted frustration, anger, and embarrassment.
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