In the middle of a soccer game, my wife and I called friends we knew who loved the sport. There was really no need for a call. We just wanted to reach people who might have seen Damar Hamlin, just 24 years old, score and then melt away on the pitch. no pulse no breath
Everything has stopped. Medics arrived to restart his heart while players from both teams formed a protective ring around the fallen player. Soon both teams were on their knees in prayer; Many players kept their heads open and cried. Tens of thousands in the stadium remained seated long after it was clear the game was over. I think, like the viewers at home, they suddenly grew together in a community of sadness and hope.
Not everyone likes soccer. I’ve heard people compare it to gladiator fights in Rome. If football is like this, then football fans must be like the spectators in the Coliseum who roar loudly as blood splatters on the sand.
Let’s be honest. If they played flag football, hardly anyone would watch. But what happened when Hamlin fell revealed the difference between football and the gladiators? The American sports fan wants to see the hit. We just want the players to be okay afterwards. When it’s clear someone’s injured, I don’t care if it’s the pros or peewee football, the place falls into an instant silence. We didn’t come for that.
I am writing to you the morning after Damar Hamlin’s young heart stopped and was revived. As far as I know, he could be back in his family’s womb, or he could be dead. But maybe this time we understand things better by staying in the moment… by not knowing. Here in this painful place we can only pray – and reflect.
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Maybe wanting such a physical game and not wanting anyone to get hurt is a built-in absurdity. Despite the new penalties and protocols, many players have been injured this year. How can that be okay? For example, why can you still tackle a quarterback after he has already released the ball?
I try to think out loud with you without already having a goal in mind. When I was a boy, they organized teams by weight, not age. I was on the 55 pound team when I started playing football. Tall and lanky, I wasn’t good at it, and by the time I’d grown into my own body, I’d become a master runner. I would have lost my scholarship if I tried football in college. But I loved playing. I used to play with guys in my apartment complex in my 20s. After I became a teacher, I played soccer with my students during recess for the next 30 years.
For the most part, the relatively few who make it to the pros have found a way to continue playing at the ultimate level at something they love. Faced with his choice of staying married or playing soccer, Tom Brady chose soccer — over Gisele Bundchen!
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Have you seen her? And they have children together. It’s a steal, loving a dangerous game so much.
Two months ago I was hit by a car while walking. I’m just recovering from this. What if someone offered me a million dollars even though I was half my age? All I had to do was agree to being hit by a car in public every Sunday. For all its brutal qualities, soccer is a game of strategy, intelligence, intuition and – occasionally – balletic grace. If I’m too old to play it, I still enjoy watching.
Just like everyone else, I don’t want anyone to get hurt, contradictory as that is. When we were kids, we climbed trees and rode our bikes through the city streets. After all, I ride a motorcycle. Even our parents accepted risk as part of growth. And there it sits.
One last thing. When Hamlin got on the turf, the distinction between the teams dissolved. As a nation, there are forces at work that ensure that we never experience anything as a single individual. Within a news cycle, counter-narratives are devised to force us back to tribal loyalties and antagonistic sides. Each event is armed for political struggle.
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The Bengals and the Bills had a moment of clarity that night. When the ambulance took Hamlin away, both teams knew one thing for sure. They didn’t want to play anymore. They didn’t want to hit anyone, at least not for a while.
Lawrence Brown is a columnist for the Cape Cod Times. Email him at [email protected]
Editor’s note: Damar Hamlin was resuscitated by paramedics and medics after collapsing during the January 2 game. He was discharged from hospital on Wednesday, nine days after suffering cardiac arrest.
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